4 Reasons American Culture Will Always Reject Socc

The FIFA World Cup Final takes center stage everywhere on Sunday - finally. Now, Everyone loves the whole world Cup. At the very least I want to. Really. I dig "the beautiful game" when countries are playing. I'll wake up in the early morning and watch any country - even North Korea - square off against another. I'll activate my vuvuzela app in this little iPhone and root for your team using the coolest jerseys (I favor ones with vertical stripes and little collars).

To the extent that I like the planet Cup though, I want to say - I personally don't like soccer. Again, I need to think itrrrs great. After all, can 7 billion people everywhere wrong about something?

Well, after endless dutiful research, I've visited the final they are wrong about soccer. Dead wrong.

Every four years, the talk round the U . s are these claims is definitely the year, finally, the fact that U . s . turns into a soccer country. Nope. It will never happen, for there are four simple logic behind why America culture will invariably reject soccer.

Reason #1: Play acting. In the love of God, the level of acting with a soccer match can make it more theater than athletic contest. Because if that is not bad enough, we're stayed with the fact the acting is horrible; so bad not wearing running shoes would make the acting in pornos look really good. Players are dependent on the play acting. Get touched, or even just close to being touched? Stop moving you a, throw your arms up upward,canucks store, and cave in, as if shot from a sniper. Get hit with the leg? Settle, grab individual, and feign mortal injury by re-enacting the death scene from Othello. Miss the target by a mere 10 meters since your shot goes twenty rows towards the stands? Go to the cameras, increase your hands to heavens, and get ready for your super slow motion just right TVs all over.

Ugh. I believed Charlton Heston was the master of overacting and "chewing the scenery." Turns out every prima donna in any No. 10 jersey has him beat.

Reason #2: The stretcher. Really, it's perhaps the play acting, but is extremely egregious it deserves a callout. If you a stretcher done over the field during an American football game, or simply a hockey rink, along with other sport everywhere for that matter, make no mistake- bad,canucks store, bad everything's being carried out in that area. Soccer? Not so much.

99% from the players carried off using a stretcher revisit action quickly. Apparently soccer trainers and doctors have invented a miracle healer that they've carefully hidden in water bottles. An effective spray with the involved area - typically either your head or one of your legs - along with the player increased off the stretcher and signaling the referee he wishes to get back to the pitch.

C'mon. Really? Are you serious? Either you're faking it and acting - again, more poorly when compared with a porn star - or a medical professional is hiding a miracle cure through the entire world, that means you're all complete douches. Whatever - neither is nice.

In the country, we like heroes, especially those who stand tall and proud,canucks store, and persevere through all obstacles, including just a little cleat mark. You understand, John Wayne and they all. Provided that soccer players keep acting like pussies, our collective sporting attention will still be consumed by the NFL along with - yes, I'm going to say it - real sports.

Reason #3: Playing referee within the game. The everyday soccer player spends for a longer time on a complement his send back the atmosphere planning to capture the referee's attention than the usual rented mule usually licking his wounds. Appropriately to get seen a gamer during this World Cup get trapped of position because he's marketing a foul or perhaps an offsides call within the referee instead of playing full tilt?

Dudes, enough already. Just shut the f up and play.

Sure, life Cup has become tormented by some high-profile, poor officiating. Who cares? That's sports. Players should play. In American sports, we like the members and teams who out perform other. Should they be getting screwed by officials, that's better still. There's more honor in overcoming and persevering than there will be in whining and having a dude with a striped shirt function as deciding factor. Bring the honor back up in soccer (see play acting, above), and possibly we care a little bit more.

Reason #4: Playing to never lose. What? Play for your tie? Absolutely, positively, undeniably un-American! The word "a tie will be kissing your sister" is undoubtedly an old saying to have a reason - it's headquartered in truth. Ties suck no one really wants to see them. About Landon Donovan with the exceptional mates over the US team mustered up a bite-sized spot of enthusiasm for soccer this recently, snooze fests like Brazil and Portugal's nil-nil draw brought it back doubly far. A step forward, two steps back.

Everyone likes a success. Many even love the "lovable loser." Nobody likes a neutralized,canucks store, neutered "tie-er." Our American sporting legends can be time-honored champions or equally time-honored warriors who "went out swinging" or "carried from their shields." There's honor and glory in winning and losing. In the middle, nothing but regret - for playing, for watching, for everything.

So, there you have it. It is really simple should you conduct scientific research and break it into information - four reasons American culture will forever reject soccer.

Modify the game with minor adjustments, and also tune is likely to be sung differently. Before this, I'll watch the final on Sunday and lose focus on about soccer for an additional four years. It may not be like I'll be missing a vessel load of action. In those four years, there'll apt to be only 12 to 14 goals scored.


No less than that's this guy's opinion.

Tweet your soccer hatred @RayHartjen.